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Work It Out Wellness

Parenting with a Phone

I recently watched a TED Talk called “How Every Child Can Thrive by Five” by Molly Wright. Watch here. Molly, a seven year old at the time of the talk, discusses the different ways parents can influence their child’s development. One thing she demonstrates is a child trying to get their parent’s attention, while the parent is focusing solely on his cell phone. It got me thinking – how many of us do this regularly? How normalized has this become without us even noticing?

 

I’ve seen families out for dinner where everyone is on their phone. Parents take their kids to the park and are on their phones the whole time. To be honest, there are times when I’m sitting on the couch on my phone and my dog nudges it out of my hand – even the dogs are noticing!

Don’t get me wrong. I get it. With emails and texts and phone calls, our work tends to follow us on our phones unlike it has in the past. To some degree, we can’t escape it. AND it’s something I think we should be more mindful of and intentional about.

 

Molly does a better job explaining everything, so I encourage you to check out her TED Talk. She explains and demonstrates how important it is when we interact with kids ages 0-5. It is important. It can truly change the course of their life, but it doesn’t stop there. I would argue that your children need you well into adulthood. Parenting, in my opinion, doesn’t stop when they turn 18. It just changes form along the way.

 

Preteens need parents to explain hormones, to work through conflict in relationships, to help with the first period, to be there to support them at school and at their activities. Teens need parents to help them learn how to drive, navigate setting boundaries in relationships, figuring out what healthy relationships look like, prepare for college/work/adulthood, and whether they like it or not, to set boundaries for them and help them make good choices. Young adults need parents to help them navigate the workforce, how to budget and pay bills, pay taxes, and more.

 

No this is not an exhaustive list, but rather it is meant to encourage parents to stay involved in your child(ren)’s life. And maybe consider being intentional about putting down the phone. After all, how else are our children going to learn to put down their phones and have a conversation with someone in real life – rather than over the internet. We all need human connection & it is up to us to model that for our children.

 

On a practical note, here are a few decks of conversation cards that I recommend to many of my clients & parents!


Interested in therapy for your child or parent coaching? Reach out to us (wiowellness@gmail.com) to set up your free 15 min consultation to see if we'd be a good fit for your family!

 

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